Wednesday, December 26, 2012

23 ADULT TRUTHS


I
This is amazing, someone is reading my mind!!!
 
 23 ADULT TRUTHS ******

1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still 
not know what time it is.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you 
realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was 
younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty 
sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the 
person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at 
work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive 
for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I 
don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks 
me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I 
swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not 
to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or 
Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Light than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and 
hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod 
and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up 
to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.
 
21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get 
dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car 
keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the 
Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 
3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

23. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 
and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 
years for men to realize that their brain is also important.

Ladies.....Quit Laughing.
 
If you forward this email, please delete the forwarding history,
which includes my email address.

Thank you!

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